I have a confession to make. It's not an easy one; but then again, no confessions are easy.
I'm not sure if I like this.
Yup. I said it (in big bold italic red font even). I'm not sure if I like what I've gotten myself into with dirt biking and am not sure I'm going to stick with it. Don't get me wrong, it's gotten a bit easier since the first time I tried it, especially with the last time I went (which I never did write about) and found the sand pit to play in (hard to hit any trees when there aren't any to hit; only have to worry about pinning yourself with your own bike - which I did). But here are some of the things I'm finding difficult about sticking with this:
- This was originally supposed to be (for me) an activity I could do with my ex. We split before I got started with it, but I stubbornly stuck with it. We are still friends and he's been helping me learn to ride and take care of my bike, but it seems a little awkward for me. I know I would not have chosen this activity completely on my own to do by myself, but it did sound like something that would be fun to do with a S.O. (It does still sound like something that would be fun to do with a S.O.)
- I have to rely on other people right now to get my bike around. That means working around other people's schedules. It's starting to feel like a chore to get everything arranged and fit peoples schedules.
- I'm not a morning person, and it takes me hours to really get moving. This is proving to be not conducive to riding with others.
- I really just want to be able to tootle* around and have fun. I don't want to be relatively hauling ass through the woods and slam headfirst or any body part first into a tree at 15-30 mph.
- It's not what I anticipated. I think I was anticipating something more like just the dirt pit, or even the woods bit. I wasn't expecting the whooped out sandy trails.
- I'm already neglecting other activities that I've enjoyed, and enjoy more, like street riding, making jewelry, going to the beach. So it is really worth my time to work on dirt riding?
I did expect it to take time and practice. I did expect it to be hard. And it's proven to be all 3 of those things. I also expected it to be fun and a shared activity; those are the areas where things are falling short. It's fun here and there but not as much as I was hoping. It's a shared activity but not in the way I was hoping.
At this juncture, I'm honestly not sure what I'm going to do. I own the bike outright; I own all my gear. I'm not in a situation where I would need to sell any of it because of financial considerations. So do I keep what I have in the event that I occasionally get a wild hair up my ass and want to go out and get dirty? Or do I make a decision after a while that it's just not for me and get rid of everything knowing that it's just going to sit around and someone else could either be making better use of it or letting it take up space in their garage?
I think it's a nice thought that I would keep everything and just go occasionally; but I'm not sure if it's realistic.
If you've been following along, I appreciate it and I've enjoyed sharing my story. I can't say this is where the story ends. It's definitely a cliff-hanger though, that may have a second season or may be one or those cliff-hangers that never resolves. Time and plenty of thought will tell. Until the next venture....whatever that may be, here or elsewhere.....
Stay tuned....?
(and, no, this post isn't an April Fool's joke/prank)
*Dave, I'm not sure what you're seeing in my use of the word "tootle"....but it does seem to cause comment and amusement. Might have to explain it to me sometime :)
